there's this thing about festivities that i dislike. not so much of the small talk that everyone's trying to engage in, but more of the strain that these festivities place on people. and so i try to see where you're coming from, but it's hard to, when we all don't really understand or say how we truly feel.

i recognise that as a couple, it's virtually impossible to be together without any conflicts and all the melodrama, but why can't these be kept at a minimum especially during festive occasions. it has always been this way since cheryl and i were wee kids. all the shouts, screams and tears, have to us, become part and parcel of special occasions, be it christmas or chinese newyear. when your mood becomes more unpredictable than the weather, that's when all my practicing of detaching myself from reality is put to use. but it's just such a pity that reunion dinners are never enjoyable, with silence all round the table. that is assuming everyone is even seated around the table.


and while everyone's anticipating the joys of celebrating with friends and family, i'd just grit my teeth and act like i'm having fun.

23:00